Choose your battles.
It is Friday, early evening. Your teenage son’s towel is on the bathroom floor. His clothes are everywhere. It is easy to see he is in a hurry.
Do you really want to ask him to clean up the bathroom? Do you really care about the bathroom? What is important to you right now? I think you want to know more about your son’s plans for this evening.
My middle son once told me, “You don’t really care what my date wore. Ask what you really want to know. Can you do that in 5 questions?”
That made me stop and think. Can I find out what I need to know in just 5 questions? Of course, I can, but I admit it was a challenge for me.
When he returned home that evening I did not start the chat with a long casual conversation. I cut to the chase and asked what I really wanted to know.
It became a mutual understanding between the two of us. If I got off course, he would simply smile and say, “Five questions, Mom.” It became our thing and it really worked for us!
Every teenager is different and I did not use this tactic with his brothers but it is one more tip, in case you need it, to keep the communication going with your teenager.
There you go. Another lesson for today. Now, go and love your son in your own special way. Some days are long but, trust me, the years will just disappear.
Love,
MarnaKay
Boys 